So back when I was a field tech, I got sent to this house with… a lot of dogs. Like double-digit levels. I think the customer ran a doggie daycare or something.

Now I love dogs, and dogs love me—kind of a mutual understanding of simple things I guess. Corporate policy says you should have animals moved out of the work area, but when you’re dealing with twelve dogs, that’s not happening. And realistically, every tech in the field makes judgment calls that don’t line up with what the book says. The best field ops teams understand that the rules should exist to back up techs, not box them in. Like, the book should help you nope tf out when a customer has a 5 foot tall hellhound with a hunting knife in its mouth, not tell you that you need to kick a 20 year old napping purse pup off his favorite couch. That’s just bad karma, man.

Anyway. This place had a whole dog containment system. Realistically, just a bunch of baby gates and room dividers, like doggie airlocks.

I don’t remember what the actual issue was I was fixing, something that needed a lot of movement throughout the house- basement to backyard, to back upstairs, etc. Standard “figure out how this 100-year-old house is stitched together” thing.

At one point, the customer decided to help out by letting all the dogs into the backyard so I could move around the house more freely. And that definitely helped. However, I didn’t know that’s where the dogs were going, and I had already opened the side gate to check the service drop.

Yeaaaahhh. You see where this is going.

Well I didn’t know the dogs were outside at the time, so I round the corner of the house to continue some outside work, and it’s this little standoff. Customer’s in front of the gate, gate’s behind her, a little dachshund is sizing up her shot at freedom. The customer says to me “uh… I didn’t know you opened that.” I’m like “yeah, I thought the dogs were inside… want me to help catch her?”

We try the slow-casual approach. You know, like we’re not trying to catch the dog but this little sausage torpedo wasn’t buying it. Shot right by me. I dove. I missed. She was gone.

So now what? Not my dog, not even the customer’s dog. This is a wild goose chase if there ever was one not involving a goose. But come on. You can’t just be like “welp, good luck with that” and leave.

I grab my peanut butter sandwich figuring hey, dogs love peanut butter! So I go walking the neighborhood like a sandwich-wielding lunatic. After about 15 minutes, I found a dog!

A golden retriever. Very friendly. Very interested in my sandwich. Took it right out of my hand.

This is not the dog I’m looking for.

Now I’ve got no sandwich, and a golden retriever who has decided I’m her new best friend. Glued to my leg. I look around, no people, no leash, no collar. Cool. I have acquired a golden retriever. Is this another dog that got out? I don’t know. Don’t know where she came from, but she’s very committed to following me.

I head back to the house. Customer’s coming from the opposite direction, holding the dachshund like a furry little trophy. I say, “Great, you found her! Uh… I found this one?” She goes, “I don’t know that dog.”

Great. Not her dog. Just a bonus dog. An extra friend.

She wrangles her escape artist inside, and I finish the job with my new best friend standing loyally by my side the whole time. She even tried to hop into the truck with me when I was leaving. I had to throw the rest of my sandwich like a decoy just to get in the truck and make my getaway. I am so late for my next job.

no time talk. must go fix. no time!
Driving out of the neighborhood, two ladies flag me down. “Have you seen a golden retriever?” one asks.

I do not have time to explain, so I just say “Yup. Down that road. Really likes peanut butter.”

And they say thanks and I drive away, leaving those two ladies to wonder why I knew this random information.

What’s the point?
idk. Sometimes you try to do all the right things and the universe just doesn’t line up for you? And that’s ok.

And then I left, thinking:
I didn’t catch the right dog.
I didn’t get a thank-you.
I did lose my lunch.

But at least one creature appreciated me that day.
10/10 would acquire a random dog again.